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Husband 101 an Instruction Manual

Letter to complaint department.

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 101Wife Kissing Husband and noticed that the new program began making unexpected changes to the accounting software, severely limiting access to wardrobe, flower, and jewelry applications that operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0. No mention of this phenomenon was included in the product brochure.

In addition, Husband 101 uninstalls many other valuable programs such as DinnerDancing 7.5, CruiseShip 2.3, and OperaNight 6.1

and installs new, undesirable programs such as PokerNight 1.3, Saturday Football 5.0, Turning Football Golf 2.4 and Clutter Everywhere 4.5. Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and invariably crashes the system. Husband 101 doing the dishes
Under no circumstances will it run DiaperChanging 14.1 or HouseCleaning 2.6.  I've tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix Husband 101, but this all purpose utility is of limited effectiveness. Can you help please!!!!

Jane

Dear Jane:

This is a very common problem women complain about, but is mostly due to a primary misconception. Many people upgrade from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 101 with no idea that Boyfriend 5.0 is merely an ENTERTAINMENT package. Husband Enjoying the Sunshine However, Husband 101 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and was designed by its creator to run as few applications as possible Further, you cannot purge Husband 101 and return to Boyfriend 5.0 , because Husband 101 is not designed to do this. Hidden operating files within your system would cause Boyfriend 5.0 to emulate Husband 101, so nothing is gained. It is impossible to uninstall, delete, or purge the program files from the system, once installed.
Any new program files can only be installed once per year, as Husband 101 has severely limited memory. Error messages are common, and a normal part of Husband 101. In desperation to play some of their "old time" favorite applications, or to get new applications to work, some women have tried to install Boyfriend 6.0, or Husband 2.0. However, these women end up with more problems than encountered with Husband 101. Look in your manual under "Warnings: Divorce/Child Support".

You will notice that this program runs very poorly, and comes bundled with HeartBreak 1.3
I recommend you keep Husband 101, and just learn the quirks of this strange and illogical system. Having Husband 101 installed myself, I might also suggest you read the entire section regarding General Partnership Faults (GPFs). This a wonderful feature of Husband 101, secretly installed by the parent company as an integral part of the operating system. Husband 101 must assume ALL responsibility for ALL faults and problems, regardless of root cause. To activate this great feature enter the command "C:\ I THOUGHT YOU LOVED ME" Husband loves Chocolate Sometimes Tears 6.2 must be run simultaneously while entering the command. Husband 1.0 should then run the applications Apologize 12.3 and Flowers/Chocolates 7.8.

TECH TIP!

Avoid excessive use of this feature. Overuse can create additional and more serious GPFs, and ultimately YOU may have to give a C:\ APOLOGIZE command before the system will return to normal operations. Over use can also cause Husband 101 to default to GrumpySilence 2.5, or worse yet, Husband Drinks To Much Beer 6.0. Beer 6.0 is a very bad program that causes Husband 101 to create FatBelly files and Snoring Loudly wave files that are very hard to delete.

Save yourself some trouble by following this tech tip Just remember! The system will run smoothly, and take the blame for all GPFs, but because of this fine feature it can only intermittently run all the applications Boyfriend 5.0 ran.
Husband 101 is a great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. Consider buying additional software to improve performance.
I personally recommend HotFood 3.0, Lingerie 5.3 and Patience 10.1. Used in conjunction, these utilities can really help keep Husband 101 running smoothly. After several years of use, Husband 101 will become familiar and you will find many valuable embedded features such as FixesBrokenThings 2.1, Snuggling 4.2 and BestFriend 7.6.

A final word of caution!

Do NOT, under any circumstances, install MotherInLaw 1.0. This is not a supported application, and will cause selective shut down of the operating system. Husband 101 will Old Lady with Husband run only Husband Loves Fishing 9.4 and Husband Loves Hunting 5.2 until MotherInLaw 1.0 is uninstalled. I hope these notes have helped. Thank you for choosing to install Husband 101 and we here at Tech Support wish you the best of luck in coming years. We trust you will learn to fully enjoy this product!"




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